


It's A Shame To Be Civilised

by brennivin



Series: MGS Summer Games 2020 [1]
Category: Metal Gear
Genre: Crack, Drinking Contest, Excessive Drinking, F/M, motherbase antics, motherbase is just a warehouse rave that went on too long, these guys have an alcohol tolerance that makes even me jealous
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:15:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,366
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25953568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brennivin/pseuds/brennivin
Summary: Set a while after The New Guy, Wallaby challenges Hyena to a drinking contest.-MGS summer games 2020 - challenge ID F2
Relationships: Original Male Character(s)/Original Female Character(s)
Series: MGS Summer Games 2020 [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1883683
Collections: Metal Gear Solid - Summer Games -2020





	It's A Shame To Be Civilised

_ I am not some kind of bush league fucking rookie.  _ Raging Hyena told himself internally, between the frustrated pounding of his heart.  _ I am not a lightweight teenager, I am a soldier.  _

Still, another voice within himself protested. 

_ Yeah, but this is just absurd. _

Since when was the inside of his head so noisy? Maybe he ought to get that checked out.

The alignment of bottles in front of him would intimidate even the heaviest of soldiers with the highest of tolerances. This wasn’t fucking safe. Still, Wallaby’s stupid beautiful freckled face was beaming back at him like she couldn’t wait to drink her digestive system and brain into oblivion.

“It’s simple. You guys are just going to go shot for shot until one of you can’t drink anymore.” Jackal explained, pacing around the barracks bedroom like he was some kind of college professor and this was going to count towards a percentage of their grades.

_ All the stories they told me about Motherbase were really true. It’s even crazier here than I ever imagined.  _ Hyena exasperatedly mused to himself. Since he had arrived here things had been a whirlwind from the very start.

“The winner doesn’t have to do anything.” Jackal stated. “The loser… Well, the loser has to take on the winner’s dare. There are no limits.”

Fuck. Why had he agreed to this again? It was absurd. Still, he and Wallaby had been working up this weirdly competitive relationship with each other. Sure, most couples didn’t feel the need to constantly one-up each other but then again, most couples didn’t meet on a private military base surrounded by overgrown fraternity kids with access to firearms and a penchant for sadomasochism.

Harrier scratched his mustache absentmindedly, and then on Jackal’s command he started to fill up the first batch of shots. He opted to start out with some schnapps, since the heavier stuff would need to come later.

Staring down at the array of small cups full of strong-smelling alcohol, Wallaby visibly gulped and fiddled with her blonde hair. 

_ Having second thoughts, are we?  _ Hyena said to himself smugly, totally not having second thoughts himself. Like, totally not having them at all. Nuh-uh.

She turned to him and nodded with determination, and grabbed the first glass in front of her. This gave Hyena a tiny heart attack as he realised she was taking initiative first, and he reached out to grab his own. Peer pressure was a hell of a drug.

They went down smoothly enough, and the sickly over-flavoured drinks didn’t taste as strongly alcoholic as others. All Hyena could really taste was that overpowering artificial strawberry flavour which he wasn’t exactly a fan of. Still, it wasn’t too bad.

Slamming their cups down they immediately went for another. Then, another.

Within a couple of minutes they were soon done with the first 6 shots. Those had been too easy.

“That stuff tastes like shit.” Hyena remarked.

Wallaby shrugged as she watched Harrier pour out the last of it into one more batch.

This schnapps wasn’t exactly the strongest stuff around - it wasn’t anywhere over 20% or anything like that. Still, drinking half a bottle in quick succession wasn’t exactly easy on the body. They were both feeling it very soon.

“Fuck. Schnapps always gets to me too much. It’s too easy to drink.” Wallaby complained, letting out a deep breath.

Hyena scoffed at her. “Giving up already?”

She frowned. “No fucking way.”

Grabbing the second bottle out of Harrier’s hand, she poured the shots herself to show just how not-giving-up she was. All Raging Hyena could do was watch, stunned, as she filled up the glasses quickly.

“Don’t ever accuse me of giving up early.” She asserted, before grabbing a glass.

Hyena hadn’t gotten a chance to look at what she had poured out, but as soon as he put it to his lips he realised it was spiced rum. The taste startled him a little bit, but he endured it. He liked rum.

Jackal was very amused by the spectacle of the couple slamming shots like their lives depended on it. He watched, transfixed as they poured their heads back and slammed their shot glasses down one by one.

Christ, he was definitely feeling it now. The whole barracks room felt like it was starting to warp and spin. He tried to recall if anybody in his life had ever warned him against agreeing to drinking contests, but he couldn't quite recall. A voice in his head snidely parroted ‘I told you so’ but he didn’t even have a face to assign it.

The next batch was looking intimidating. He noticed that Wallaby was swaying just a little bit. Did he look as drunk as she did right now? How many shots had it been? It had to have been something like 10 shots each. Holy shit, that was an abnormally high number. He had never really tried to measure his own tolerance, but he was quite impressed with himself.

Another batch of shots, and then another. Soon the small bottle of rum was emptying too.

He could feel his skin warming up all over but also numbing up, and his lips were tingling with the remnants of his last drink. He licked at them and savoured the tangy flavour of the rum.

Fuck, what time was it?

Another handful of filled shot glasses was in front of him and he just started drinking, making sure to drink every time she did. She looked fucking wasted. Still, she refused to stop.

How many was it? 14? 18? He didn’t know anymore. He just drank.

Fuck, he was starting to feel bad. Like, the kind of bad where you know one more shot will make you puke. He just knew if he took this final shot he was going to make himself awfully sick. Wallaby knew that, too. She was staring down at the final filled drink that was sitting in front of her like it had murdered her entire family. This had been such a stupid idea. She swallowed a lump in her throat, and unbelievably she reached forward and picked up the glass with a shaking hand. 

As she gingerly glanced over at her boyfriend, her big round eyes drenched in panic, he picked up the glass in front of him. It was only fair.

They lifted them to their lips and then stared at each other again. So, they were at a stand-off.

_ Fuck it, I can’t do this.  _ Hyena’s inner voice pleaded with him.  _ One more drink and I’ll give myself the shits. _

He watched, mortified, as Wallaby plugged her nose and clenched her eyes shut to pour one last shot down her throat.

It was too late. He’d already lowered his glass.

“Too bad, Hyena.” Jackal patted him jovially on the shoulder.

_ Enjoy puking your guts out and pissing out your ass, you dumb bitch.  _ He thought, chuckling at his girlfriend who was now leaning against her bunk totally spun out.

“Fuck, I’m gonna be puking my guts out and pissing out of my ass.” Wallaby blurted out, burying her face in her hand.

He chuckled again as she said exactly what he’d been thinking, but felt his body lurch and had to contain his laughter in case he spewed all over himself. He really needed a glass of water.

* * *

Hyena woke to an incredibly hung over Wallaby prodding at his face. He turned over to see that she had crawled into his bunk.

Rubbing the sleep out of his eyes and raising his eyebrows at her, he let out a few coughs.

His head was pounding and his voice sounded like shit. “Wh- What is it?”

She smiled smugly, her eyes all bleary with exhaustion. “You have to do a dare, now. I won.”

Glaring her down, he turned back over. Today was his day off, so he could sleep longer. “Sure, you won this time.”

“Wait until you hear what I came up with.” She teased.

Hyena was already asleep. She rolled her eyes and pressed the side of her face to his back, falling back asleep as well.

Being in love was fucking stupid.


End file.
